Inside the Mind of a Newb

lol. If anyone is wondering, I make all the pictures for this blog myself, as in, the captions. This real-life photo explains what I forgot to mention in my Camping 101 post. I forgot to mention that ANY pro-gamer will have played every map the game has to offer so many times, they will automatically check almost every camp spot. This is another reason camping will pretty much always screw you over. Seriously, if someone kills you because you were sitting behind a box, and they came around it and instantly headshot you, don't be surprised you silly newb. Respawning completes the circle of life.

What I really want to talk about, is how newbs think. I'll start off by explaining why the Wall of Bullets shooting technique works every single time.

Wall of Bullets - For some unexplainable reason, newbs run into people shooting. For example: You're in a gunfight, and all of a sudden, you're both reloading. You stay out in the open, because your a Pro gamer, and the other guy hides behind a box. You both finish reloading, but the other guy is still behind the box. You start spamming the side of the box, and all of a sudden he pops out, and you easily kill him because the stupid newb ran into your bullets.

If you think this technique is a joke, try it. You will be so surprised lol. I'm still surprised when it happens. Here is a staged video clip I made to give all of you a better idea of how this works.


Now the reason this is in my post is not only to introduce you to another valuable gaming technique, but for us to analyze why the hell this can be used reliably. Why would anyone run into someone spraying a wall of bullets that your going to run into and die? Do you feel cocky you can own them because they are about to reload? Or is it the sudden adrenaline rush that makes you want to run out there and be part of the action? It could even be the fear of dying and letting your team down. You just NEED to reload ASAP and get back out there and kill them. You don't want to wait. As my teammate heatwave always says "DUDE! Stop being greedy! You're always thinking about yourself!"

Well? Which is it? It's all of them! The newb is quite a fascinating creature. It constantly has thousands of emotions of fear and depression flowing through its head when it's just trying to get that positive ratio it will never get. During times of extreme danger, the newb will do anything to satisfy it's current mindset, even if it involves running into a wall of bullets. Lets say a newb's mindset is "I'm totally going to get that positive ratio today!". Well, if he's on the receiving end of the Wall of Bullets technique, then of course he is going to jump out. He's thinking "OH GOD, I'M SO CLOSE! I'M 4/44 RIGHT NOW, BUT EVERY KILL COUNTS! YAAAAAAAAAA!" and then he jumps out and instantly dies. Sigh. We lose more newbs everyday this way.

Oh! I almost forgot, this will probably be the last time I do this, since I rarely want to play COD4, but here is some more screenies implementing the Pwnage Pyramid. Once again, this was just me playing randomly 3 maps in a row. As for the first screenshot, keep in mind I joined TEN (10) minutes late. lol.